Friday, 21 February 2014

Date, Couple, or Stay Single ?

When I shot myself out of the closet I gathered some serious steam that led me right into the dating world, and things were, well, ok.  I learned quickly that I was picky and I shouldn't ever imagine what a guy might be like based on a quick online chat and a couple of pics.  It really doesn't work that way, pretty much ever.

But then I got caught-up in some of that crazy human drama and put any real romantic possibilities on hold for... well, a couple of years.  I've lived, I've learned, and I'm back, hopefully not much worse for the wear.

Apparently I had some excess analytical energy at the end of this short but potent work-week so I've applied it to summarizing my options as if they were business choices.  Here's what I've determined. 


  • Meet new people, see different faces and new things and places too
  • Economies of scale: momentum builds relatively quickly
  • Usually a disappointing experience, lots of trial-and-error
Conclusion: Possibility for fun, flings, and maybe even a relationship.


  • Seeking a relationship can carry with it a whiff of desperation
  • Compromise may be more likely
  • Comfort and stability is possible
  • You may end up dating an "open relationship" kind of guy and everything gets confusing
  • Or, you might end up with a broken heart
Conclusion: Having someone adore you and want you home can't be all that bad, could it ?

Stay Single 

  • Anything you want, any time you want
  • You are revered by every Couple guy, but they can't spend any time with you worshiping you
  • Tends to turn into a mostly solitary life as you watch friends get coupled-off, start families, move away, etc
Conclusion: Freedom is great but it becomes increasingly difficult to shift into something else.

It's true in all parts of life, I suppose: freedom isn't free.

Although it may not have been the conscious goal, it seems I've analyzed myself back into dating and out of the solo single life.

Wish me luck, and a hearty "may we all live in interesting times" to all... blessing, or curse.