Friday, 26 December 2014

2014: Quite a Gay Ol' Year

Well it was quite a year.

"Coming out" of a closet in 2014 was no big deal anymore, which in itself is a Big Thing.  Athletes, rock stars, actors, politicians.. it doesn't matter anymore.  We're lucky, we're special.. and if you don't want to respect that, it's your own damn problem.

We focused our microscopes on issues of race, religion, and sexuality like we never have before -- laser focus on single cases, the world around -- and that meant we had elevated ourselves.

If one single horror caused billions of people to take notice, then just maybe we'd done something right, at least in our ability to communicate.

And then there was The Interview -- a wacky movie that caught attention not for the gay antics (and there are sooo many of them) but for making a "Supreme Leader" cry, if just in fiction.

There is no doubt that everything has changed, at least in the Western World, with regards to LGBT rights and respect.  But it's going to get better, for that there is little doubt.

Instead of attempting to predict the future, I'd rather look back on what was in 2014:

I was fortunate enough to have visited Broadway for my second time in May.  And for Christmas Eve I watched Rent Live on video, and (like the Hollywood adaptation) I cried (I've yet to see this breakthrough musical in person).  Live performances represent some of the very best talent we have as a people. Enjoy and support live shows, wherever and they are, and however they are presented.
Don't get caught-up in "but I like this" when it comes to music.  Music is like smell + math to our brains, so embrace new songs, performers, and styles. Do not get stuck in a rut.  That's too easy.  Music is magic.
The Interview was a totally hilarious movie. Hope it paves the way to more live-to-internet releases, because many of us have better home theatres than the theatres have theatres.  
Take notice of every moment of hate, bigotry, violence, stupidity, and ignorance on this Earth. Every single one of us makes a big difference in the connected world.  I do.  You do.
It's a new world, there is no doubt of that.  But if we don't participate, we're merely one ant colony instead of what can be the impressive Milky Way travelers out there named "Human".

Friday, 21 February 2014

Date, Couple, or Stay Single ?

When I shot myself out of the closet I gathered some serious steam that led me right into the dating world, and things were, well, ok.  I learned quickly that I was picky and I shouldn't ever imagine what a guy might be like based on a quick online chat and a couple of pics.  It really doesn't work that way, pretty much ever.

But then I got caught-up in some of that crazy human drama and put any real romantic possibilities on hold for... well, a couple of years.  I've lived, I've learned, and I'm back, hopefully not much worse for the wear.

Apparently I had some excess analytical energy at the end of this short but potent work-week so I've applied it to summarizing my options as if they were business choices.  Here's what I've determined. 


  • Meet new people, see different faces and new things and places too
  • Economies of scale: momentum builds relatively quickly
  • Usually a disappointing experience, lots of trial-and-error
Conclusion: Possibility for fun, flings, and maybe even a relationship.


  • Seeking a relationship can carry with it a whiff of desperation
  • Compromise may be more likely
  • Comfort and stability is possible
  • You may end up dating an "open relationship" kind of guy and everything gets confusing
  • Or, you might end up with a broken heart
Conclusion: Having someone adore you and want you home can't be all that bad, could it ?

Stay Single 

  • Anything you want, any time you want
  • You are revered by every Couple guy, but they can't spend any time with you worshiping you
  • Tends to turn into a mostly solitary life as you watch friends get coupled-off, start families, move away, etc
Conclusion: Freedom is great but it becomes increasingly difficult to shift into something else.

It's true in all parts of life, I suppose: freedom isn't free.

Although it may not have been the conscious goal, it seems I've analyzed myself back into dating and out of the solo single life.

Wish me luck, and a hearty "may we all live in interesting times" to all... blessing, or curse.